Category Archives: Reproduction

Uterus Project

As part of the Government Free VJJ project, I crocheted two uteruses destined for a specially chosen US Legislator.

Here is a little scene as they cavorted with other crocheted beings around this place.

I’m not sure what they’re doing.  The little guys to the left paying homage?  Supplicating’s fine too.

I think the uterus on the right wants so bad to bop ‘em but I’ve been able to talk her out of it so far.

How can Men Feel the Pain of Abortion being Illegal

What does it take to get males to feel the pain of being female and living during the dark days of illegal abortion?

I have been told by men who are more than acquaintances of mine:

“You know giving birth is not a life time sentence for any woman.”

and:

“I’m a man and I won’t be needing an abortion anytime soon. But that’s how it is. I can’t do anything about it. If I could…well, I still wouldn’t.”

I have been captivated by imagining something that could convey what I think they’re missing.

I had a conversation with another male who agrees with me that abortion should remain legal. He considers it when he votes and as he conducts himself in this world. However, even he said something that put the abortion issue on par with, say, a distant economics issue.

I stopped him. “Wait. It is Not like that. That’s my whole point. It’s as if up till 1973, women were allowed to bash you over the head with a shovel. Finally, you guys got a law passed making that illegal. But now a bunch of female politicians are talking about getting rid of that law so we can shovel-bash your head with impunity again.”

He got quiet.

I asked, “What if I told you, ‘Why should I care? I’m not a man.’ ”

Yeah. Even he didn’t completely get it till then.

So. This being 2012, it seems appropriate to do a crowd-sourced collection of stories of a possible alternative history.

Imagine the following history. I invite you to write a fictional account of a male you knew or heard of and what his life turned out to be like during that dark time.

Up until 1973, in the United States, men who were involved in a pregnancy were required to wear their cock and balls in a bun for the complete length of time of the pregnancy they were involved in.

Pregnant women could let other women know which man was responsible. Any woman who knew a particular man was associated with a pregnancy had the right to see his bun holder at any time. If he didn’t show it or if he wasn’t wearing it, she then had the right to slice his cock down the middle and soak it in lemon juice.

The bun holder contraption was sold by prescription at local pharmacies. Men would wait till they could talk with a male pharmacist. Then they would lean over the counter, quietly asking for one their size, trying not to let any women hear. Manufacturers learned early on to put a holder two sizes smaller that the size printed on the package to guarantee a good fit. In the beginning, too many of them fell off and many men protested.

If the pregnancy ended in an abortion, the man could stop wearing the bun holder. If the pregnancy ended in childbirth, the man had to wear the bun holder solidly for 18 years except for 1 hour a week, the hour off being chosen by the woman who was impregnated by him.

Due to a massive men’s movement that lasted decades, laws were enacted to prevent this treatment of men.

But now a bunch of female politicians were talking about getting rid of these laws. Men were twirling themselves into a tizzy. Women flicked back that they didn’t care. Why should they care? They don’t have cocks and balls.

Feel free to add your story of men caught in this barbaric behavior before 1973 as a comment here.  If comments are closed, add a reply to the forum topic or send me a message.

Life without Baby

Lisa Manterfield‘s site Life without Baby helps those who are dealing with the unwanted situation of not having children of their own.

Her tagline, filling the silence in the motherhood discussion, and her book, “I’m Taking My Eggs and Going Home” address the difficult topic of how to deal with wanting a child when it doesn’t seem to be in the cards.

After crossing paths with Lisa through one of Melissa Dinwiddie’s Hangouts and joining Lisa’s site, I realized I had no idea about how difficult this subject could be. I had known since I was 15 that I would never have kids. I petitioned my parents to sign to have my uterus removed. Why deal with all that menstruation and carry this organ around when it wasn’t going to have a purpose?

They: You might change your mind.

Me: I know I won’t.

My parents wouldn’t sign.  Of course, that was the right decision.  But I didn’t change my mind.  Not wanting to have regrets, I took a hard look at my choice in my 30’s.  I didn’t find any denial.  I haven’t had any kids and I have no regrets.

Give me a newborn and I can coo away with the best of them.  I could even win cooing competitions.  Getting a baby to smile at me is quite a high.  But that doesn’t correlate for me with wanting to have one, which has always been a curious dichotomy to me.  But that’s for another blog post.  I always felt I was supposed to do something else with my life, like be on some unsolvable math problem research team.

But I bring this up because I have been clueless around this issue and I’ve said some of the things that people in Life without Baby feel hurt by.  When a neighbor had a miscarriage, I said, “Just have another one.”

I get the pain now.  I didn’t get it when I said it.  I’m really sorry about that.  I cringe every time I remember that moment.

Life goes on and hopefully we all keep learning?