I didn’t know how things were going to go when I started making subversive doilies and talking about taboo subjects. But one thing that’s happened for sure is that I have received many opportunities to see and address my own responses to stereotypes although my configuration was a bit backwards from maybe the typical way we think of stereotypes.
I started out thinking all men would laugh at my doilies. I’ve met men who turn their heads and don’t want to look. Or they make triply sure I won’t publish their name, which I didn’t know anyway.
I thought all gay men would laugh. Nope.
I thought all gay women would laugh. Not so much. I felt them looking at me suspiciously, like, what’s she up to.
A woman wearing a petite gold crucifix surely would surely be offended, I thought. I hesitated to answer her questions about what I did. She became one of my biggest fans.
I still make lots of assumptions. Kinda can’t help it. They just happen … but over time, they become easier to see that I’m making them. And they have weaker effects.
Here’s just one more example – of people who look rough and scary but are offering a very kind and just service. The last few lines are precious.